Up in the Cirrostrati

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Impressions can be misleading. It’s often difficult to try and see yourself as others see you – but I’ve heard the same comments from friends and new acquaintances alike: a lot of the time, my head seems to be in the clouds. I definitely don’t disagree with that, nor does it bother me. The (figurative – I’m a nervous flyer) clouds is one of my favourite places to be. Clouds get even better when you find one hanging out with a rainbow. Snapping that photo the other day made me pretty happy too. I quite like clouds – fluffy lone cumulus, grey and streaky stratocumuli, all-encompassing sheets of strati that blanket the earth – but like the average cumulonimbus (discover your favourite cloud here!), I seem to be drifting off topic a little. I am a dreamer, but I feel comfortable dreaming because I have always planned ahead for the day to day things that keep me busy. I am a big secret planner. As soon as I get an idea in my head, I have it organised to the last detail with two or three alternative routes to meet the goal I’m looking for. Despite, or perhaps because of, this, if my backup plans fail and I run out of problem-dodging solutions, it makes me feel a little deflated. I suppose you could say that I sink down from the clouds a little, seeing as I’m so obsessed with them at the moment. However, this image does fit my earlier point nicely – I like to organise ahead in order to stay up. My mood swings, when things don’t go to plan, can occur from the minutest of setbacks from a cancelled night out to a cancelled holiday. Initially it is frustrating, but I am slowly realising that a change of attitude is all that’s needed to minimise the blues from an unexpected plan change. This big cloudy thought has stemmed from such a simple event as staying in on a Saturday night. Honestly. It left me feeling a little lost. But then I got onto thinking of all the other stuff I might do. The list includes: eating pizza, reading a book I meant to start ages ago, writing a commentary on the opening of Joyce’s Ulysses for a friend, watching ‘The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy’ with Fin for the 5th time this week… It got me thinking that sometimes you need to have your plans cancelled every so often to get the stuff done that you really want to do, but don’t think you have time for. It was a little thing this time, but I hope I can apply this idea the next time something goes unexpectedly wrong. Sometimes a setback doesn’t need to be viewed as a setback, but as life giving you time for the things you don’t even realise you want to do yet.

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